The Day Before....and After

Early Monday a.m. before the hurricane

It has been a humbling time here in New Jersey. The storm destroyed much of the New Jersey shore.  The upcoming summer will not be the same for many people, but the outpouring of generosity and kindness is overwhelming. 

The NYC marathoners are running to Staten Island to help people...how wonderful. In the midst of destruction, there is humanity.  That humanity is a breath of fresh air, in the eye of a very nasty hurricane Sandy.

Back to Cape May

My beautiful Cape May stones

Going back to Cape May....the Ocean Club Hotel to participate in a women's weekend...Mariposa's Mecca...walks on the beach, stone collecting, bike riding, horse and buggy rides and delightful company. I am looking forward to seeing the delightful people who made my summer perfect.  Many of them are back home in different parts of the world...they will be missed and remembered and are always kept in a special place in my heart.

Crunch Time

Yesterday working

Today is my last day in Cape May.  I will miss it it here but it is definitely time to go home now.  My adult children and puppies await!  I have about another 2,000 words until I send what I have done in Cape May, to my editor.  That will be done today.

I am excited about this storyline and think you will be too. 

Back to Work

Late afternoon surf on the beach in Cape May

After a couple of blissful days off I am back at work with the lovely ocean as my backdrop and a beautiful summer...yes summer breeze blowing the palm trees in view.  It is as beautiful as a July day here.  I am thrilled that I am still here writing.

Today I am editing Chapter 19 and then continuing the storyline.  I cannot wait to tell you more about the complexities of Angelique and her journey to discover her true Native American Heritage. She learns a lot about herself and the proud people she can now call her own. How she discovers them and how the information comes to here is the real mystery. Stay tuned.

After the Storm

 We have had some rain in Cape May and all these beautiful stones washed ashore.  Quartz of many colors and ambers are among the choices lining the shore.  I have never seen such a beautiful variety of stones.  I am going to need another hotel room for them.

I am pushing forward in my story line and am going to take a few days break to rest.  It is both draining and invigorating depending upon what I writing and it is time to enjoy a bit of this beautiful town.

A Girl and Her Stones After A Storm

High Winds, Humidity and Another 2,000 Words

Sunset Beach stone collectors

The humidity is crazy high here today, but the sun is blazing and the wind is blowing a cool breeze over the ocean.  Winds are predicted to pick up all day, and my computer screen is already moving slightly back and forth.  I have to position it just right to get it to stay still! 

Anyway, the story is flowing and words are filling up the screen.  It's a good day in the neighborhood!

Another Day of Writing

The view from my Tiki Hut office !

Yesterday, the heavens opened up in Cape May but today is like a perfect summer day...no humidity and lots of sunshine.  The ocean water is warm but the undertow has really been crazy for the last couple of days. Here in the Tiki Hut, the weather remains the same...I feel motivated and excited about my work!  No matter what the sky is doing, I can get work done because I can see the ocean and the ocean inspires me continually.

Today I am adding some finishing touches before sending to my editor.  It promises to be a very productive day!

The Characters of My Life

Ahhh life....

It is so interesting to meet new people when you are sitting and observing life.  So many people just let life pass them by...but then again perhaps that is a judgement call.  I probably am not right because I cannot possibly know what is going on in someone's life, but as a writer I can make up interesting facts that are simply a figment of my imagination. I look at them and get an idea about something...and spin a web.  It's fun and much more involved than that..but I love what I do!

Communing With Nature

More Beach Stone

I am back at Cape May continuing my book.  At 7 a.m. this morning I was on the beach. I filled two hefty freezer bags with stones and communed with a couple of seagulls that pecked at the bags thinking the stones were food.  Unfortunately, they put a big hole in the bag and made it more difficult for me to carry the stones across the street to my hotel room.  But they were beautiful all the same....I love choosing the different colors and shapes.  They almost call me to them.  It is inspirational and natural and puts me in the mood to write, when I am connected to the earth. After that, I had a ballroom dance lesson.... where we worked on some new rumba steps. They were a little difficult to learn, but it feels good to conquer the turns which have frustrated me before.

Today I am reading everything that I have written for my newest novel;  40,000 words and then tomorrow I will start back with Chapter 18. It's exciting and I am happy with the direction of the story.

Hypnosis and Writer's Block

After my Lyme disease diagnosis explained a lack of focus, I was elated. The antibiotics worked, the Lyme was no longer in my blood and the focus came back....and then it went again.  I kept saying..."I can't focus," and it was a self fulfilling prophesy.  I found someone to hypnotise me to stay focused with my novel writing.  The results were amazing.  I was sure I could never be hypnotised.  I was sure my type A personality was too strong to submit to the power of suggestion....but I did.  My focus returned...in fact I cannot be swayed away from my work under any circumstance.  My frustration level has gone down and my words per day has increased way beyond what I expected.

Bounty of Nature

I am so intrigued by these beautiful ocean stones from Cape May! They are part of the wonderful quilt of nature.  Nature plays a big part in the story I am writing now, as do dreams.  Dreams are amazing indicators of what is going on in our lives. I kept a pad and pencil by my bed and wrote about my dreams before I forgot them.  We don't always remember our dreams and sometimes I had nothing to write, but when I did it was so much fun learning.

Cape May Ocean Stones



The Subject Matter

Another Cape May wonder!

Whatever I am writing...I am feeling.  If I am writing about dying and death I will grieve.  That's where I am these days. In my storyline, a couple has passed away in a car accident.  Writing about the person who is left behind, and what she is feeling, is exhausting.

I need to feel what she is feeling.  I need to place myself inside her head and her heart to know what is happening.  In doing so, I thrust myself into the midst of tragedy and try to make sense of it where there is none.  I try to find joy when there is none...and I try to give them hope.  But hope is not available everywhere.  It comes at a big price and is attached to "the other shoe which is about to drop."

The World is My Oyster

My sweet Natasha

My time in Cape May was extraordinary.  Words were flowing because of the positive energy and wonderful people around me.  I have always loved people from different cultures and there is a plethora of cultures at the Ocean Club in Cape May. It's interesting when someone meets you....and GETS you.....who you are....who you want to be.....your dreams.....and most importantly how you view the world. Although this totally intuitive and positive outlook cannot be translated into every character I create because not everyone is positive or intuitive, but it can be part of someone's persona.  Sweet Natasha will definitely be the model for a loving, compassionate and strong woman who has big dreams with a heart to match.  I feel honored to know her.

Productive Time By The Sea

The wonderful crew at the Ocean Club Tiki Bar
John, Anna, Jordan, Me, Chandler, Beth

This is such a wonderful working experience. I love being by the ocean and even though everybody is on vacation but me, I am able to focus.  In fact the life around me just makes me feel so excited to be part of it that is pushes me each day to make my word count.

Making moments count could be the "title" of this time spent in Cape May.  There have been so many beautiful moments....inspirational...happy coincidences that validate your decisions and choices.  I am so grateful to be here with these wonderful people.



Meeting New Friends from Jersey Shore, Pennsylvania

Isn't it ironic that I meet two people from Jersey Shore, Pa when I am at the Jersey shore?  Liz and Butch are teachers from this sleepy one horse town and wanted me to mention them in my book, however I couldn't figure out a way to do that.  We mutually agreed to put themin  my blog as a compromise.  Let's hear it for Butch and Liz!

They are very nice people and it was a pleasure to meet them.

Native American Storyline

My beautiful work space at the Ocean Club, Cape May, NJ

Imagine working on a Native American storyline on the beach? A lot of people who are creative are motivated by the water.  The smell, the sound of the waves, and the salt is all healing and soothing. For me all of it is inspiring and I feel so blessed to have this time by the sea.

On August 9, 2012 it will be three years since my mother died. I will passing the day writing. I hope she is looking down at me and smiling because of the Native American storyline.  Her maiden name was Crofoot: used to be Crowfoot but the W was dropped to assimilate.  I will also collect some beautiful stones by the beach, in her honor. These will be put in their own spot in my study at home in an abandoned birds nest that I found.  These will be Mary Ann's stones. When I get stuck with something, I will hold the stones and ask for her help like I used to do when she is alive. It sounds like a plan. 

Writing At The Ocean Club,Cape May, NJ

Writing here has been so productive for me. The sound of the ocean and seagulls in the background is a welcome reminder of my summers at Chadwick Beach Island. Positive energy is everywhere here...not only in Cape May, but at the hotel where I am staying.

When you are here for so long it's important to take care of your body and soul.  As I have said sitting so long takes its toll after a long day of writing. After work, I swim in the salt water followed by 45 minutes of ballroom dancing.  Most days that is enough to get the kinks out, but not yesterday.

At the Ocean Club they have an in house Massage Therapist; Penny Morris.  I had an East Meets West Massage with deep tissue and yoga stretching.  Penny comes to your room and is very knowledgeable and friendly.  As soon as she walks into your room you feel her soothing positive energy.  She sets up your room and gives you a choice of lovely music. At the end of the massage, I felt energized yet peaceful.  She does energy work also which means you will feel a positive shift in your personal energy. She is a delightful person.

 I just love my experience here and want to share it.  It's a great place to unwind, relax and enjoy the splendor that is Cape May!

Picture Writing Perfect

I am continually amazed by the beauty of nature. N.J. takes such a bad rap for being remembered by your first view of flying into Newark or New York airports and seeing the turnpike ahead of you.  I had planned writing in Montenegro and Capri this summer for another novel I am working on... that trip is happening in September and I know I will be inspired by the beauty of both those places but for now I couldn't ask for more natural beauty than Cape May. I feel so blessed to experience such interesting places in the world. The multicultural staff at the Ocean Club make me feel as if I am staying in an exotic resort getaway; a secret place of beauty and inspiration that is a rare find.

It was such a pleasant surprise to have this source of inspiration all around me, every moment I am here.  Today I am meeting with a realtor, having dinner with a new friend who has invited me to teach at her spiritual retreat at the Ocean Club in October.... and dancing the night away with the resident Dance Champion, Tom Cupp. Tom is one of the best ballroom instructors I have ever had with his ability to teach something and change it up until you as the student "gets it."  He also has a wicked sense of humor, quick wit and makes a lesson so much fun, you don't realize how hard you are working.

Spirituality and dance are definitely some of the "stuff" that inspires my writing and I am so excited to have found it in Cape May.  I have a feeling, I will be part of this sleepy (in a lovely way) seaside town forever now that its salt water flows through my veins.

The Words Keep Coming!

The two beautiful Sarah's at the front desk  with me in the middle!

I just love the staff at the Ocean Club.  They are making my stay feel just like home. I have extended my time here because I am so productive with the ocean in front of me and the kindness around me.  The energy here is so positive; it's a mecca for creativity.



Cape May in Photos

These are some of the beautiful images that inspire me daily with my writing.  The beach is laden with tumbled stones of every color and I spend my "off" time collecting them as I walk the beach.  The houses and umbrellas are colorful elements in an otherwise "nature" colored beach.  It's a joy to behold.

There Is Always A Breeze

My lovely friends who work the Tiki Bar at the Ocean Club in Cape May
Chandler, Amin, Me and Anna

Once I leave my cabana after a morning of writing, I go to the Tiki Bar where the ocean view and salty breezes are just not to be believed.  The landscape in the distance is dotted with orange and white umbrellas and sand dunes.  Music is blaring and since I am used to working in  cafes with lots of noise, this is a perfect environment to get more work done. There is such a wonderful staff at the Ocean Club. They have made me feel so welcomed.  I will be back next year to write the sequel!

As it Storms.....

About to have a thunderstorm

We are about to have a lively thunderstorm here is Cape May.  Everyone was kicked off the beach and is surrounding the poolside Tiki Bar where I sit and write.  The rain is coming and the beautiful breeze is shifting. It was horribly hot so I am glad for the beauty of the rain. 

I am tearing apart Syd Fields book about Screenwriting and loving every moment of it when I am not actually putting words to paper.  This is such a productive time....cannot wait to share more.

More Cape May

I am writing so much while I am here in Cape May.  It is the perfect place to be creative.  There is a beautiful mix of history and nature that is awe inspiring and it is just lovely.

Picture postcard Cape May

The night before last I had a lovely "tasting" at the Sea Salt Restaurant at the Ocean Club in Cape May, NJ.  This was the very gracious gift of the General Manager and Chef Lou.  Every dish was perfectly executed...some with the simplicity of yesteryear and others with a more complex blend of flavors that burst in your mouth. One of my favorites was a smoked trout and roasted beet concoction that was amazing! Either way, Chef Lou has a gift.  His menu is eclectic and exciting to contemplate, so that by the time you receive the food, you are salivating. His staff is exceptionally knowledgeable on every single item on the menu.  They are excited and proud to serve you.  The chocolate trio at the end of the meal was heavenly.

As my tasting progressed, the Chef came out to speak with me to ask me about portion size and taste. They chose wine parings taking into consideration my likes and dislikes. Such personal attention was so unexpected and delightfully appreciated. Thank you for a lovely evening.

Another Perfect Day

Beautiful Cape May Beach

It's absolutely beautiful down here today!  Sailboats, speed boats, umbrellas and parasailers dot the landscape.  People are loving the beach weather today and I spent the wee morning hours collecting the most beautiful stones you could imagine. The stones are going in my real bird's nest in my study, a tribute to the spirit who resides in that room!

What a Difference a Day Makes

Having summered at the New Jersey shore, I welcome this beautiful change of weather with the blustery winds and the salty air.  It is a lovely atmosphere to work because the horrible heat has disappeared. The morning was filled with social media, stretching and a confused protagonist who is searching for herself....like the rest of us in this world!

Blustery winds, rough water and a salty sea breeze!

This is One Crazy (In a good way) Universe

Just as I totally changed gears for a minute, and began work on another project, all things are pointing me back to the previous one.  Life is like that.  There are so many diversions and  paths that we could take....my thought is keep your eye on the ball and stay the course.  Put things in order for the next path/project so that you are ready to go in a heartbeat....when the tide...ultimately changes for the millionth time!



No one believes this is NJ

Writing From the Ocean Club Hotel - Cape May, NJ

From my walk this morning!

I am staying at the beautiful, newly renovated Ocean Club Hotel in Cape May.  I have been here 2 days and I cannot say enough wonderful things about my experience.  The staff is polite and engaging and the service impeccable. I am here to work and they respect my writing time when I am hidden in my beautiful cabana over-looking the ocean. Truly, I never have to leave for I can have excellent quality food by the pool or in the amazing Sea Salt restaurant, where the chef turns every dish into a little miracle for the palate.

Adventures in Cape May

The beauty of nature is everywhere!

Today is an extra hot day and unfortunately I did not calculate the weather into my work time. I am outside my room in a cabana working and actually had to stop because my computer keys were too hot to touch. The little girl from the next room saw me working out with my weights and physio ball, and asked me if I wanted to play with her....so I did.  We have been swimming in the pool together all day because you cannot survive the heat otherwise.  Her name is Anna and her mom gave me permission to use her name.  She is sweet and playful and boogies to the latin music blasting at the bar by the pool. What a delight!

I am ballroom dancing again!  Last night was my first day back in over a year and a half.  There is a dance pro in Cape May who coaches and someone referred me to him  It was so much fun being back around something I love.  I expect it to keep the creative juices flowing why I am writing!

A Real Room With a View!



My lovely work space for the next 3 wks.

This is my incredible work space for the next three weeks.  The view from here is the ocean.  The sound is tranquil and calming and the scent is sweet and feels sticky from the salt. For me it is the perfect locale to write my newest project. 

I will update with beautiful pics of my journey here.



One More Day....



Early a.m. Cape May

I will experience this peaceful beach in just a day.  This beautiful landscape will be my inspiration as I follow some "new characters" around! I cannot wait to get started. 

Sailing Away

The marina in Cape May

I never appreciated the lovely charm of this sleepy.....(not really but it sounds good!) seaside town because I summered further north. What everyone else has known forever, I am just discovering.  I cannot wait to get there and explore. I will be working, but inspiration comes from all our senses and they will be in high gear during my time at the beach.  I am expecting a very productive few weeks!

Another View of Heaven

I am so crazy excited about my stay in Cape May.  Generating ideas for a new book is always my favorite time in a project....naming the characters and creating a storyline is so exciting. Hope everyone is having a delightful summer and maybe...just maybe.... I'll see you in the sunshine.



Beautiful Cape May Awaits!

Oasis By The Sea

Cape May at sunset

This is my oasis by the sea....a place to commune with nature....to smell the sticky salt air and feel inspiration by the beach.  For me, and for many writers....water does it.  I prefer salt water because I summered at the New Jersey Shore.  While I will enjoy the scents and scenes around me, I am there to complete a novel.  Rising before dawn, exercise begins my day followed by a healthy fruit smoothy. Hours of writing follow in a beautiful cabana by the sea. I feel so blessed to be surrounded by such beauty and inspired by nature to write a story with a Native American twist. Two weeks ago as I was planning this getaway, a real eagle feather fell from the sky and onto my feet.  I am hoping that means Grandmother earth approves of the project!.

A View From Below

All pics taken laying on the ground

This is a beautiful moment gone horribly bad.

Imagine being in the forest and enjoying the pure beauty of it.  Delight in the varied colors and scents that make life 3-D.  Breathe in deeply as you watch an ant hill being meticulously constructed by industrial worker antsl  Take your shoes off and let your toes feel the soft spongy coolness of the bright green moss.  Lay down at the base of a tree and see the leafy view from below. 

Feel the safety of being one with nature and then imagine it being taken away....in a brief moment of utter hell... loss of innocence...sheer terror and another life is given in the name of war...death would have been less horrifying .  She must live her life every day re-living this memory....until one day she realizes that this one moment took a piece of her soul and she must stop the damage before it touches future generations. 

 

Share The Love

Purple pansies and two tone violas

My lovely neighbor called me today.  She and her husband planted butterfly plants... and as a result,  monarch and other butterflies migrate two doors down to the pansies on my deck! I could watch them forever flitting around, landing on the abundant purple pansies.  The contrast of colors from the orange and black butterflies to the purple flowers, is spectacular.  Tiny violas are interspersed next to the pansies, and they have a faint scent of perfume.  It is heady and wonderful to appreciate nature.

By planting the butterfly tree, my neighbor gave me a gift.  When we do something nice, we are giving a smile.  For the person who receives the kindness, something so simple could get them at a time when they needed that random act to put them on a better path. Conversely, if we experience negativity or anger or violence....we could live a very different life than we had planned.

 War is hell.  There are always many sides and many cultural alliances that we do not understand.  I think however, we of many nations can agree that there is always collateral damage.  Most of us don't want to think about it.  Some of us don't care about it.  But when you ARE THE COLLATERAL DAMAGE, as are the children I write about, your perspective becomes personal.

Many who have survived pay the price for other's greed and evil. Some become examples of what not to do with your life, and others inspire a generation.

Trust Your Instincts

Bella, Nico and Juliet posing for the camera

My three dogs live their lives by instinctual demands.  When they are hungry, they eat.  When they are thirsty, they drink.  When another dog torments them, they bite.
Imagine if we humans actually listened to those intuitive feelings that drop into our brains from time to time. 

My instincts tell me to stay away from anything that can hurt me.  It is a simple human reaction of self preservation.  There are however people who seem to need jump into the head of volcanoes.  The kind of person I am speaking about usually does so to try to protect or "save" someone in some way...a rescuer. When two rescuers get together....as in the case of my protagonists, a lot can change.  They have a mission.....they have one goal and together they can save many lives.  But at what cost?  With each one, a little bit of their souls gets chipped away....until finally, they wonder....was it worth the fight?  Is the life a child worth selling their souls....losing themselves completely to the wrong side of the battle? Stay tuned to see what happens.

The Faces of Hope



Dad as a little boy!

That's me on mom's lap with Dad next to me!

During 1999 my family was dealing with the recent death of my 51 year old brother and a diagnosis of melanoma for my father.  My mother and I were with the oncologist is a small sterile room in an offshoot of Sloan Kettering Cancer Hospital.  The doctor was explaining to him that it was as if someone coated pine needles with melonoma and threw them at his stomach.  Wherever those pine needles landed, is where he had cancer.  He was filling up with fluid and uncomfortable.  The doctor told him he would drain the fluid from is body in hopes of relieving his discomfort.  It would take a full day to do so.

"Ray, this is a bad diagnosis. There is not much time."  I asked the doctor to tell us how much time but my father did not want to know.  I exited the room, unable to breathe and not wanting my parents to see me cry.  The doctor followed me and said..."I give your Dad 7 weeks to live. I know you just lost your brother and this is a very difficult time for your family." He touched the side of  my arm and looked in my eyes....and then walked down the hall.

I cried as softly as I could manage thinking of my mother....losing a son 8 months before, and losing her daughter many years before my birth....and now her husband of  54 years.  I couldn't breathe thinking of her pain...thinking how I could breath life into her...when my heart was breaking apart, bit by bit with each subsequent loss.

To my right I noticed a man helping his young but fragile wife.  She was  using a walker and her body showed the ravages of chemotherapy. Slowly she walked towards me and told me she had double breast cancer.... and that she was feeling very sick from her chemo treatment that she had stopped moments earlier.  Her husband and she wrapped their arms around me and asked me why I was crying.  Can you imagine the humanity of this moment?  A woman so desperately ill comforting me? I was overcome with emotion.

"My brother died 8 months ago and the doctor says Dad only has 7 wks to live. If he is correct, he will die on my brother's birthday.  My mother will not be able to survive another loss...I won't be able to help her because my heart is broken.  I am not strong enough."

I felt as if the walls were caving in. My legs folded under me and my body began to shake.  They simply held me tighter and the wife put my head on her shoulder.  She kissed the side of my face and told me to never give up hope.  "Hope is all we have.  Faith is something that illness cannot rob from us. You will get through this. You will have the strength you need and we will pray for you."
I thanked them as they walked away.  I went back into the room with my parents and silently thanked God for that couple and their wisdom and kindness.

Dad died August 26, 1999...what would have been my brother's 52nd birthday with Mom and I at his side.  I woke up remembering that lovely couple today that so enriched my life on that day...thankful to have met them and grateful for the life ahead of  me.

The Spider Web

Today as I walked my three dogs, I spotted a small perfect spider web in the wet grass.  It has rained for days, and some poor spider choose this flooded grassy area to take up residence. Now I admit, I know nothing about spiders except...I am not a big fan of them. But their handiwork is quite amazing.  How long did it take for them to weave that beautiful lacey web?  How much determination did it take? I am sure it is instinctual in spiders but in humans, it would take a high level of determination.

Let's apply the principles to people!  One person chooses a path that takes them to success and the other seems to follow  things without having a plan.  If they do not stick to it....like the spider....their "web" or their path does not hold together.  When it rains with a vengence, the web may be washed away, and hours later I will find another in it's place.   You cannot stop that spider from doing what he is supposed to do! We humans on the other hand, could learn a lesson or two from a spider.  Rome was not built in a day and spider webs may come and go, but our willingness to go forward and start over can only be thwarted by our own stumbling blocks.

If a spider can rebuild a complicated web in a matter of hours, then we can remove stumbling blocks as they come at us.....and even better....as we create them. Fear of failure, fear of success and just plain fear of the unknown can keep us from our greatest achievements. 

Not a spider web, but nature at its best!

The next time you want inspiration, just look to nature.  There are so many examples of pure instinctual determination, you will feel encouraged! For me....taking a picture of the beautiful spider web was an interesting message.  As I looked at it covered in the early morning dew, it was translucent and beautiful, but when I photographed it, it was too soft to translate clearly.  Elusive and surviving but a moment in time, it had an effect on me.  Time is precious...and I want to enjoy each moment.  So I will say adieu now....I have lots of webs to weave.

Find the Time to Live As You Love

Nico as a pup

Waking up a little early in the morning can net you huge productivity benefits. When I work from home and not a cafe, I am constantly pulled in many directions.  Should I wash the dishes, pay the bills or do a little cleaning?  If I wake up an hour earlier and attack those necessary but mundance chores, I am ready for my work day at the appropriate hour. 

I remember my mother telling  me that with each passing year, time got faster.  Well it feels like the truth.  There seems to be little time in the day to accomplish all that is expected of us in our lives.  Better said...there is little time to do all that I expect of myself each day....write, exercise, walk the puppies, light housekeeping and maybe....a moment to breathe in the beauty of the day!

Anyway, the extra hour is helping me make time to breathe in the deliciousness of each day.  That part is the component that I look forward to the most.  It reminds me how much  richness there is in everyday life.

Enjoy Your Ride ....Even If It Scares You!

The happy smiling faces of my pansies!

I am always talking about paying attention in life..watch a butterfly, cuddle a puppy, taste some cous cous or travel to exotic locations! Experience life to the fullest and feel every moment. Be present in your own life! The thing is if you get complacent  you may miss an opportunity.  We all know that not every opportunity belongs to us because we have choice.  But some of them are meant to wake us up or change our lives in some way.

I am not talking about just the once in a lifetime opportunities that you know you must accept.  I am talking about the small forks in the road, or the subtle nuances in life that may direct you to an unchartered path.  The unchartered path does not scare me. It excites me.  I had to figure that out along the way. We all feel fear and some of us push through the fear and some of us stay in the fear. That fear can stop us from realizing our true potential.

A few blogs ago I talked about writers facing their fears by writing the absolute worse scenario around their deepest fears. I admitted, I am not a big fan of flying...but I do it anyway because the world would be way too small for me, if I did not. Facing my fear is simply getting on the plane and going where I want to go!  What if that fear got in the way on a particular day and there was a producer in the next seat next to me looking for new material for a movie. What a missed opportunity for a writer!

I don't want to "what if" myself out of life.  I don't want to hold back because of fear. I want to look life square in the eyes and be ready for the next chapter with open arms and more importantly, an open heart.

Journal to Montenegro

I am preparing for my adventure to Montenegro...I have been told of all the hairpin turns and twists to visit beautiful architecture cut into the mountains. The Ostrog Monastery is carved at the top of a mountain and getting there is turn after hairpin turn!.  Tradition dictates that you walk up to the Monastery barefoot and when you are finished....walk down barefoot. I will attempt that. I have booked a night sleeping on the cold floor with a blanket and a pillow....just as the Monks do.  The bones of a saint are buried there, and great healing takes places in this sanctuary.  People from around the world come there to feel closer to God just as my protagonist does everyday. I will walk in her shoes, sleep in her bed and become her more intimately, just as I do when I write her life.

This is going to be one exciting journey.  Montenegro is only one destination.  The other destinations have more crazy turns in common....and I have a confession!  I really don't like to fly, and I hate heights! So the way I'm thinking is I better get over it really fast, because there is no way to do this trip without "feeling the fear, and doing it anyway!"

The Time Journal

Take a trip with her.  I think you will enjoy the ride whether it be on foot, in the air or  by boat.  Join her in the car as it navigates the trecherous roads of the Almalfi Coast.  Walk with her up into the side of a mountain into the spiritual halls of Ostrog Monastery.  Sleep next to her on the hard floor with a scratchy wool blanket and feel the healing energy outside the bones of a saint. Become one with her....feel her joy...feel her pain....live her life with me. Ride along side her on the watery ride to Capri and sit next to her with pen and paper in hand as she negotiates the next plot twists and turns. When you return to your life, walk to your mirror and gaze into the eyes of the person who greets you.  You are strong and courageous and she would delight in knowing that you are now prepared to faithfully walk your journey.

Pansies in the Pines

Imagine these lovely posies blooming in the mountains at the base of a hundred year old pine tree. Obviously not planted by a gardener's loving fingers, but rather a random seed blown as the leaves of autumn have died.  The trip that this little seed had to take is unfathomable.  Surviving a blustery fall and a blizzardy winter, it came to rest at the base of the pine tree.  It's tiny stems sprouted with the melting of the first snow as first blossoms faced the sun as if in worship. Hikers passed the small green survivors in wonder.  There is a sweet smell in the air....like the onset of spring...with a sprinkling of sweet.  The colorful flowers survive the changes in temperature under the warmth of their mother pine. The hot summers could destroy their blooms, but don't.  Onlookers admire them and comment on their resiliency...believing that they serve as a testiment to the strength of the human spirit.

Memories of Mom

The colors of spring 1

I am writing on my deck today remembering a very sweet spring day from the past.  My mother and I sat in the exact same place sharing coffee and memories. She was happy, reasonably healthy and in the moment. My mother was legally blind and could not do the one thing she loved most.....read a book.  It was a source of frustration for her but she coped by using audio books. Ultimately, listening to books would make her tired....and sometimes fall asleep!  Not so with my writing, thank God.

She was such a blessing to me.  For hours on end, she listened to my manuscripts as I read them aloud to her. Often, she would stop me, conveying a thought about my work.  Losing one sense made her keenly feel with the other senses, and she gave me such good advice.  As I sit here today, I feel her next to me smiling. She loved spring, as I do and I can almost hear her thoughts on how happy spring made her feel.  My memories of spring will always be tied to my mother.  Happy spring Mom...you are missed.  I love you.

Thanks for the Memories

Please check out my website......lindsayalexandradawson.com to read my true story about a lovely visit to Morocco.

It was surreal to be in that exotic land with the delicious scents and heady aromas following you wherever you walked...the sound of a very foreign tongue with it's gutteral enunciations confusing you with wonder! It was hynotizing and exciting.  Add the food that feeds your soul...and it was a perfect "stimulate the senses" vacation.

Jordanian Memories

My time in Jordan is helping me with the character development of my male protagonist who is 1/2 Jordanian.  I have so many fond memories of my time there.  The Bay of Aqaba is exquisitely beautiful...the water so warm and blue.  And the food....still tempts me today....many years later. Isn't it funny how food unites people....families and cultures? Especially when you leave your home and travel to another country, sharing the knowledge of common foods, which really means a common culture....is like sharing the most intimate secret.

A Glimpse of Her World

She belongs to a tribe....but not in the sense of what you are thinking.   It is a group that is tightly knit and exclusive in that you must be born into it.  If you leave, it is almost impossible to be invited back.  If you stay, you  agree to a constricting life.  Life is predictable.  Everyday you wake up and know what is expected of you.  Your behavior must mirror those of your family ahead of you.  Conform is the word of the day...in fact the word of your life....and therein lies the problem. Rules suffocate her.

A Fearful Moment in Time

The view from her small cold room.

She was tired and cold.  The floors were made of stone and felt cold under her feet even with shoes on. She sat on her narrow cot that passed for a bed and grabbed the rough wool  blanket and wrapped it around her shoulders tightly. Nothing took away the bone-chilling cold. She was worried about the children she was sworn to protect and questioned her belief that she could actually do it.  While pondering this she was lost in her fear...and then she heard them again.....the faint footsteps rushing past her door.  Were they barefoot?  She wanted to push open the door and see what was happening, but she was frightened....realizing that she was part of something bigger and some way...some how she had to stay focused so that she could get to the truth.